Our Adoption Story: Part 2

The Challenging First Year:

We had been taught in our Foster Care training that the first year would be the hardest.  We were told about the “honeymoon period”, where everything would be full of fun and excitement, where she’d be on her absolute best behavior!  

(That first year, the kids adored one another.)

After the honeymoon period you are taught to expect a “testing phase”.  This is the phase were they say, “Do you REALLY love me?”  This is the phase where they will push every limit there is to push!  It’s when their actions say, “If I scream and swear at the top of my lungs in Church, will you still love me?”  Or, “If I throw my desk over in class and swear at my 4^th grade teacher, will you still love me?”  And so on.

We knew how hard the testing phase would be. In fact, during our foster care training the trainer said, "My job is to scare the hell out of you."  We knew what we were up against.

The honeymoon period came and went.  The testing phase came and went.  Life went back to normal.  Our new daughter was neither the angel from the honeymoon period or the terror from the testing phase, she was simply Kayla.

 

Finalization & Temple Sealing:

In April 2010, 8 months after Maylee joined our family, we were asked if we wanted to continue with the adoption.  Which meant, did we want to finalize/make  it legal?  After a blissful honeymoon period and an exhausting testing phase, I dropped to my knees, tired, feeling beaten down, and needing counseling from my Father in Heaven.  I remember saying, “Heavenly Father, I just don’t think I have the tools to help Kayla, but I love her so much.”  And when the prayer finished the words came to my mind, “No, you don’t have the tools to help Kayla, but they will be given to you as you need them.  You must trust.”  And with that I chose to:

Let Go and Let God

We finalized the adoption that month.  After being baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, a choice that was always hers to accept or decline, she was sealed to us in the Bountiful Temple for time and eternity.  She was eternally ours!

 

One Year Down and Eternity to Go:

Whew!  That first year was a doozy!  It was everything the foster care trainer had prepared us for and now with the testing phase over and life returning to normal, I was ready to help Maylee (who by this point had decided to change her name) tackle some of the challenges in her life.  My life became devoted to my daughter in every possible way.

She returned to school, for 5^th grade, a stronger, more capable, and polite young lady.  The teachers could not believe the rapid gains and improvements she had made in only a year!  My phone began ringing regularly, e-mails flooded in, and people I didn’t know stopped me on the street to say, “You have done an amazing job with Maylee!  She’s like a new kid.  You must have worked so hard for her.”  You cannot begin to understand my relief!   It was happening!  My daughter was evolving into this beautiful butterfly!